Chapter 11 - The Willpower Method

It's an accepted fact in our culture that quitting marijuana is very difficult and requires immense willpower. Most books advising you on how to stop warn that it will be an immense struggle. But the truth is that stopping smoking marijuana is in fact ridiculously easy.

If your aim was to run a 4-minute mile, that would indeed be extremely challenging and require years of hard training, and some people are likely physically incapable of achieving it. But in order to simply stop smoking marijuana, all you need to do is to just not light up anymore. No one forces you to smoke weed except your own addiction. And unlike food and water, it clearly isn't essential for basic survival. So why should permanently ending marijuana use be difficult? The bottom line is that it truly isn't - it's marijuana smokers themselves who needlessly make quitting difficult through attempts at using sheer willpower or other methods that force them to feel deprived.

We certainly don't decide or choose to become addicted to marijuana. Like most, you likely just experimented with trying cannabis a few times out of curiosity or peer pressure. And because smoking it is so widely available in today's society, you kept doing it occasionally. Before fully realizing what was happening, you're smoking marijuana multiple times per week, then daily, just to relieve stress or boredom. It becomes an automatic part of your lifestyle that you feel you need in order to cope or function normally.

For most marijuana users, it usually takes a serious effort to quit to realize just how tight addiction's grip has become. When you actually try to follow through on stopping, that's when the deeply ingrained "green monster" of marijuana dependence starts screaming out for its regular dopamine fix again. You experience intense cravings and feel a strong urge to smoke simply for relief, even though you know rationally that lighting up again will only worsen the overall situation.

With the classic cold turkey willpower approach, you sincerely weigh the pros and cons of quitting, and you logically know from an analytical standpoint that you absolutely should stop smoking marijuana completely. But deep down, you still have an embedded belief that completely abstaining will require real sacrifice on your part, and this feeling of deprivation creates significant stress. Both widespread societal brainwashing and the brainwashing from your own addiction constantly reinforce the notion that quitting marijuana must be exceptionally challenging and next to impossible.

So instead of starting a quit attempt feeling optimistic and empowered like being freed from prison, you start off feeling doomed and gloomy, as if you're trying to climb Mount Everest while chained to a ball and chain. You fully expect the process to involve tremendous physical and mental agony, untold sacrifice, and a lifelong battle against nearly irresistible temptation to smoke again. This defeatist attitude almost guarantees failure from the very outset.

Now assume you do successfully tough it out for a few days or weeks without smoking at all. You start to feel a bit better physically and mentally, your head begins to clear, and you aren't obsessing over marijuana constantly. You're able to enjoy things sober that you convinced yourself required being high. Consequently, you start forgetting all the logical reasons you wanted to quit smoking marijuana in the first place.

But make no mistake - even though you may no longer be actively high, the deeply rooted green monster of addiction is still planted firmly in your brain. It starts sending intense impulses and rationalizations demanding you smoke marijuana again. The green monster only cares about its next fix of dopamine and stimulation. So your addicted thinking finds endless clever excuses to justify taking "just one hit" or bargains with yourself to relapse:

"Life is short - we could get hit by a bus tomorrow! I should enjoy this while I can." "I clearly picked the wrong time - I'll stop after I get through this stressful period." "I can't concentrate or be productive at work without smoking first." "I'm getting irritable and lashing out at loved ones - smoking is for my family's sake." "Let's be honest - I NEED marijuana to relax, enjoy life, and be happy." "Marijuana isn't addictive, I just have an addictive personality."

At this stage, the smoker usually gives in to temptation and has "just one" smoke again. They feel tremendous psychological relief and release by giving the green monster what it wants. But they also feel guilty and awful at their lack of control, wondering why they're unable to just quit marijuana permanently.

The addict mistakenly concludes they simply lacked the willpower or strength required to stay quit. But in reality, they didn't fail due to lack of willpower - they made a rational decision to smoke again based on the brainwashing about marijuana's "benefits" and the difficulties of quitting.

The marijuana addict who attempts to quit through sheer willpower suffers not so much from the physical withdrawal pangs themselves, but primarily from the mental and emotional doubt, uncertainty, and tug-of-war over whether they can or should really give up getting high permanently. They feel miserable and incomplete, insecure without their habitual crutch.

The smoker spends weeks or months in this depressed state just waiting expectantly for their desire and temptation to smoke to gradually fade away with the passage of time. But subtly, if they can manage to tough it out and survive weeks or months without smoking marijuana, the obsessive desire does indeed fade. However, many ex-smokers ruin this progress by deciding to test themselves with "just one puff or joint" to prove they can still control it. This nearly always ends up rapidly restarting their full-blown addiction. They falsely believe they can casually smoke here and there without getting hooked again.

A minority of marijuana smokers do manage to successfully quit long-term through sheer grit and willpower after many months of torture. However, even these victors usually remain brainwashed to some degree, still believing that marijuana relieved their stress or aided their creativity and inspiration. Lingering delusions like these are precisely why so many ex-smokers end up relapsing and returning to regular use again months or years down the road.

Once an addict, always an addict. Many ex-smokers who consider themselves "sober" will decide to have just "one hit" here and there for nostalgia's sake or to prove to themselves that they're finally in control. But soon enough the obsessive cravings will return, and they begin the slippery descent back into addiction. Even as they regain regular smoking habits, they still assure themselves and others that they can stop again easily after certain milestones. "I'll definitely quit smoking once I get through this upcoming holiday season/summer vacation/career change/etc." But the cruel trap has already snapped firmly shut again - they're fully re-addicted.

Contrary to popular belief, enjoyment or pleasure has nothing to do with why we continue compulsively smoking marijuana over time. If enjoyment was truly the motive, non-addicted users wouldn't even need a nightly partaking to feel normal or have any issue going days without smoking. We falsely assume smoking marijuana must be inherently enjoyable for us; otherwise we cannot allow ourselves to believe we could be so stupid and short-sighted as to continue with such a destructive habit that ruins health, motivation, and life.

Marijuana only provides relief from the withdrawal and cravings caused by previous use. Once free of marijuana and the dangerous illusions it breeds, you'll be cheerfully released from any desire or need to smoke ever again.