Chapter 24 - Will it be harder for me?
When examining marijuana addiction, it quickly becomes obvious there are infinite combinations of factors that will determine exactly how easily (or with how much difficulty) any individual user will be able to permanently quit.
To begin with, each person has their own unique personality, character strengths, background, career path, family circumstances, health status, timing, metabolism, and so on. Certain professions or situations undoubtedly present greater challenges than others when it comes to achieving any significant life change. But the key insight is that providing the years of pro-marijuana brainwashing can be effectively removed from your mind, even factors that appear disadvantageous do not necessarily have to prevent you from succeeding.
Let's examine a few typical examples that illustrate why some marijuana users fall into the trap of believing quitting will be harder for them:
Members of the medical profession often report struggling more with quitting cannabis than the general population. At first glance, this seems highly counterintuitive - shouldn't doctors find it easier than average given their advanced understanding of marijuana's effects on the mind and body?
It's true that having greater awareness of the proven health consequences provides more forceful and urgent reasons for wanting to stop. But this alone does little-to-nothing to actually make accomplishing permanent abstinence any easier. Here are the key factors actually working against addicted doctors:
Their constant intimate awareness of all the health risks paradoxically creates fear. And fear is one of the primary emotional states under which we feel that recurring strong impulse to self-medicate or relieve tension by lighting up.
A doctor's work is inherently exceedingly stressful and demanding on any given day. They are usually unable to successfully relieve or handle the additional stresses imposed by the marijuana withdrawal pangs and process while simultaneously trying to save lives and stay focused.
Doctors also carry the significant additional burden of guilt, whether self-imposed or projected by society. The belief that they "should" absolutely know better and be setting a sterling example for the rest of the population by leading completely marijuana-free lives. This adds extra pressure and fuels the counterproductive sense of being "deprived" of a well-earned reward when quitting.
Now consider how these pressures and beliefs tend to play out when an addicted doctor attempts quitting marijuana cold turkey:
In their day-to-day high-stress work environment, they have likely formed an extremely strong conditioned response where their brain links lighting up immediately after getting off work to the ensuing sense of relaxation and dopamine replenishment. Even though it's a false association, their addiction falsely credits the marijuana for the entire positive situation. Consequently, when they attempt abstaining completely, using marijuana becomes like a long-lost friend in their mind - the urges feel exponentially more intense and painful than average. The sense of loss amplifies greatly.
However, the key insight here is that if the doctor can first conquer the years of pro-marijuana brainwashing and lingering illusions about cannabis being integral to relaxation and winding down, this entire house of cards collapses. They can then enjoy resting after work wholly free of marijuana or temptation. Physical and mental cravings are seen as echoes of the past, with no bearing on the present moment. Life becomes infinitely more relaxing without dependency.
Another particularly challenging situation for quitting marijuana is pervasive boredom and stress combined. Two typical examples would be a student stuck in a dull but demanding course load or a single parent holding down a repetitive job each day but also caring for children alone at home.
In both cases, the individual is forced to perform monotonous, unstimulating tasks every day of the week while simultaneously coping with significant pressure and responsibility. When these marijuana users attempt to quit cold turkey using only their willpower and discipline, they inevitably have many endless empty hours in which to sit around fixating on their perceived "loss" of marijuana from their lives.
This breeds strong feelings of depression, anxiety, restlessness, and self-pity as the endless days drag by without relief. But again, the truth is that with the proper mindset education and techniques, they can learn to productively fill time and even enjoy activities marijuana-free. The mental pangs are revealed as phantoms of an addiction now receding into the past.
The key realization is that any marijuana addict - regardless of individual differences like age, gender, intelligence, profession, responsibilities - can find it remarkably easy and even enjoyable to quit smoking permanently, provided they commit to following all instructions laid out in this book.
If you currently feel yourself worrying that being continually reminded you've stopped smoking by certain triggers will inevitably grind you down, remember to use those moments for celebrating and taking pride in the fact you are finally liberating yourself from lifelong marijuana enslavement. Each pang becomes an empowering milestone, not torture.
Now let's examine the two most common primary reasons for someone failing or relapsing during a quit attempt:
The influence of strong external cues and triggers in the ex-smoker's environment and daily routine. For example, getting offered a joint by friends, finding a forgotten vaporizer or stash while cleaning, driving by a dispensary, seeing depictions of people happily smoking in movies or music videos, etc.
When blindsided by temptation in a moment of weakness, the quitter feels jealous and immediately begins rationalizing reasons why they deserve "just one hit." The unfinished reprogramming makes them an easy mark.
Having an exceptionally difficult, stressful day or life event. This breeds strong self-doubt and second-guessing about the entire quitting process.
With the willpower approach, the addict feels doomed and starts mourning the fact they don't have marijuana to help cope or provide relief like it always has before. Their resolve crumbles.
But what must be firmly remembered when encountering either of these major pitfalls is:
For external triggers: Use them as cue to remind yourself there is no such thing as just one puff or joint when you are addicted physically and especially mentally. This is not a sacrifice - rejoice in the fact you've finally broken the chains of lifelong slavery to marijuana! Feel empathy and compassion for all still trapped in the illusion.
For bad days: Remember that even when you smoked daily, bad days and moods happened just as frequently. Getting high never made those problems just disappear. Ups require downs as part of life's natural rhythm. Withdrawal just means you have one less effective option to try coping, not that you are doomed to permanent darkness. Stay positive.
The tendency is for newly quit smokers to irrationally blame every new difficulty on the fact they stopped marijuana, rather than seeing the true trigger. By mentally fixating on and moaning about the "loss" of an unavailable coping crutch, you just create a no-win situation and set up failure. Know that you made the right decision to quit, so do not undermine your progress by doubting yourself.
Keeping a constructive, solution-focused mental approach will make everything vastly easier during marijuana withdrawal and beyond. The next chapter reveals how subtly adjusting your perspective can remove mental obstacles and pave the road for lifelong success.
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